Adultery

I cannot trust my voice.
It shakes, it betrays the truth inside your darkening eyes.

I cannot trust my mouth.
It is trembling, quivering in this moment of unconcealed emotion.

I cannot trust my heart.
It jumps into my throat, blocking air, blocking blood to my brain.

I cannot trust your arms.
They held me captive, a prisoner in satin beds, taut and strained.

I cannot trust your smile.
It lied to me, revealing its pink poison, silencing my own.

I cannot trust you.
I cannot trust me.
I cannot believe this love you have given me.
I cannot believe that you belong to me, when you sleep in her arms.

You possess me, you own me. I am a pleasant piece of property.
You tear me apart, your kiss is toxic, your touch is acidic.
We lie here, entangled in those satin sheets, forgetting her name.
We can't seem to remember why we began this charade, why try?

I love you. Three words that you have yet to say.
I love you. I wouldn't believe you anyway.
I love you. Please, don't leave me alone again.
I love you. Please, don't go, please stay.

I cannot trust this heart that craves you.
I cannot trust these arms that cry out for your warmth.

I love you does not even begin to explain this beautiful agony you put me through.